Kindness is Beautiful
Societies and cultures from around the world have changed the standards of beauty with every century that has passed. In the 1600s, heavier set women were admired due to the likelihood that such a woman was wealthy enough to eat well. In the 19th century, it was a woman’s facial features that were emphasized, a slender waist (enhanced by corsets), and ankles were also highly sexualized. In the 1920s, women began to be much more involved in sports, dancing, and “the pictures,” which led to change from emphasis on the face to the ideal slender body silhouette in a chemise. In the 1950s, the blond bombshell, Marilyn Monroe, a curvy beauty had a great deal of speculation around her for what her actual weight and dress size were. In this era, corsets were replaced by girdles and pointy bra cups, and bathrooms began to have electric lights and mirrors that brought attention to acne and other areas that were previously disregarded as being important. In the 1960s, the icon that changed the fashion industry was British model, Twiggy, who highlighted diet and exercise as a means in which to change the body internally rather than through external means such as corsets, girdles, and the like. As the decades continue, what is considered to be beautiful and fashionable is always in flux. Clear skin, just “the right amount” of curve in “all the right places,” and if this is not possible, then photoshopped images will make it so. What I have come to find from our day and age is that HEALTHY is the true goal, and for each man and woman to be what his or her body type IS.
For as long as I can remember, I have struggled with my body image. I grew very rapidly as a child, towering over the rest of my peers, until middle school, in which I abruptly stopped, and the rest of my classmates both caught up and surpassed me. I also have a naturally higher bone and muscle density, which has been an amazing asset in terms of a lack of broken bones throughout my life, but translates to a higher number on the scale. In short, I am a bit of a brickhouse, solid and stout. I got made fun of for my weight on the scale when I was younger, and in turn, I thought of myself as being ugly, fat, and grotesque. A bit dramatic perhaps, but for anyone who has been through middle school/adolescence, it was an incredibly awkward time that laid quite a foundation for the years to come. At my heaviest, I was close to 200 pounds, and at my smallest, I was 137 pounds. Despite the fact that the BMI puts me in the “overweight” category in the 140’s, that is by far my favorite place to be as far as weight is concerned. It is a happy, healthy, and well proportioned place for MY body. I do not need fit any mold, but I do need to feel good in who I am and how I show up in this world.
My weight has yo-yo’ed up and down over the last many years, with my first diet being the Atkins diet when I was in 6th grade. My mom was trying it out, and I hopped onto the opportunity to get thinner as well. I always greatly admired my beautiful mother who had been a model when she was 19. I wanted to have her thin hands, perfectly filed beautiful nails, and long thick hair, just like her, when I grew up. What I understand now was that she also had a certain flair of confidence about her, a very strong presence that conveyed that she was not to be messed with. For that reason, she very well might have attracted those who wanted to bring her down, like moths attracted to a flame. I have watched her time and time again battle against the criticisms of others, and eventually, with the crippling doubts of herself, but she has remained as beautiful as ever, both inside and out. Betty Friedan once said, “Aging is not lost youth, but a new stage of opportunity and strength.” As my mother ages, she becomes all the more the epitome of grace, strength, and beauty. She is no longer the model she was when she was 19, but she is all the more the role-model that I am grateful to have as I watch her grow and expand in other areas of importance, apart from her looks.
Unfortunately, my mother and I are not alone in our troubled body image. I would like to share some disturbing statistics about eating disorders in our country. Please note that the following comes directly from the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Related Disorders website.
Eating Disorders Statistics
General:
• Almost 50% of people with eating disorders meet the criteria for depression.1
• Only 1 in 10 men and women with eating disorders receive treatment. Only 35% of people that receive treatment for eating disorders get treatment at a specialized facility for eating disorders.2
• Up to 24 million people of all ages and genders suffer from an eating disorder (anorexia, bulimia and binge eating disorder) in the U.S.3
• Eating disorders have the highest mortality rate of any mental illness.4Students:
• 91% of women surveyed on a college campus had attempted to control their weight through dieting. 22% dieted “often” or “always.”5
• 86% report onset of eating disorder by age 20; 43% report onset between ages of 16 and 20.6
• Anorexia is the third most common chronic illness among adolescents.7
• 95% of those who have eating disorders are between the ages of 12 and 25.8
• 25% of college-aged women engage in bingeing and purging as a weight-management technique.3
• The mortality rate associated with anorexia nervosa is 12 times higher than the death rate associated with all causes of death for females 15-24 years old.4
• Over one-half of teenage girls and nearly one-third of teenage boys use unhealthy weight control behaviors such as skipping meals, fasting, smoking cigarettes, vomiting, and taking laxatives.17
• In a survey of 185 female students on a college campus, 58% felt pressure to be a certain weight, and of the 83% that dieted for weight loss, 44% were of normal weight.16Men:
• An estimated 10-15% of people with anorexia or bulimia are male.9
• Men are less likely to seek treatment for eating disorders because of the perception that they are “woman’s diseases.”10
• Among gay men, nearly 14% appeared to suffer from bulimia and over 20% appeared to be anorexic.11Media, Perception, Dieting:
• 95% of all dieters will regain their lost weight within 5 years.3
• 35% of “normal dieters” progress to pathological dieting. Of those, 20-25% progress to partial or full-syndrome eating disorders.5
• The body type portrayed in advertising as the ideal is possessed naturally by only 5% of American females.3
• 47% of girls in 5th-12th grade reported wanting to lose weight because of magazine pictures.12
• 69% of girls in 5th-12th grade reported that magazine pictures influenced their idea of a perfect body shape.13
• 42% of 1st-3rd grade girls want to be thinner (Collins, 1991).
• 81% of 10 year olds are afraid of being fat (Mellin et al., 1991).Collins, M.E. (1991). Body figure perceptions and preferences among pre-adolescent children. International Journal of Eating Disorders, 199-208.
Mellin, L., McNutt, S., Hu, Y., Schreiber, G.B., Crawford, P., & Obarzanek, E. (1991). A longitudinal study of the dietary practices of black and white girls 9 and 10 years old at enrollment: The NHLBI growth and health study. Journal of Adolescent Health, 23-37.
For Women:
• Women are much more likely than men to develop an eating disorder. Only an estimated 5 to 15 percent of people with anorexia or bulimia are male.14
• An estimated 0.5 to 3.7 percent of women suffer from anorexia nervosa in their lifetime.14 Research suggests that about 1 percent of female adolescents have anorexia.15
• An estimated 1.1 to 4.2 percent of women have bulimia nervosa in their lifetime.14
• An estimated 2 to 5 percent of Americans experience binge-eating disorder in a 6-month period.14
• About 50 percent of people who have had anorexia develop bulimia or bulimic patterns.15
• 20% of people suffering from anorexia will prematurely die from complications related to their eating disorder, including suicide and heart problems.18Mortality Rates:
Although eating disorders have the highest mortality rate of any mental disorder, the mortality rates reported on those who suffer from eating disorders can vary considerably between studies and sources. Part of the reason why there is a large variance in the reported number of deaths caused by eating disorders is because those who suffer from an eating disorder may ultimately die of heart failure, organ failure, malnutrition or suicide. Often, the medical complications of death are reported instead of the eating disorder that compromised a person’s health.
According to a study done by colleagues at the American Journal of Psychiatry (2009), crude mortality rates were:
• 4% for anorexia nervosa
• 3.9% for bulimia nervosa
• 5.2% for eating disorder not otherwise specified
Crow, S.J., Peterson, C.B., Swanson, S.A., Raymond, N.C., Specker, S., Eckert, E.D., Mitchell, J.E. (2009) Increased mortality in bulimia nervosa and other eating disorders. American Journal of Psychiatry 166, 1342-1346.
Athletes:
• Risk Factors: In judged sports – sports that score participants – prevalence of eating disorders is 13% (compared with 3% in refereed sports).19
• Significantly higher rates of eating disorders found in elite athletes (20%), than in a female control group (9%).20
• Female athletes in aesthetic sports (e.g. gynmastics, ballet, figure skating) found to be at the highest risk for eating disorders.20
• A comparison of the psychological profiles of athletes and those with anorexia found these factors in common: perfectionism, high self-expectations, competitiveness, hyperactivity, repetitive exercise routines, compulsiveness, drive, tendency toward depression, body image distortion, pre-occupation with dieting and weight.21——————————————————————————————————————————————————————
1. Mortality in Anorexia Nervosa. American Journal of Psychiatry, 1995; 152 (7): 1073-4.
2. Characteristics and Treatment of Patients with Chronic Eating Disorders, by Dr. Greta Noordenbox, International Journal of Eating Disorders, Volume 10: 15-29, 2002.
3. The Renfrew Center Foundation for Eating Disorders, “Eating Disorders 101 Guide: A Summary of Issues, Statistics and Resources,” 2003.
4. American Journal of Psychiatry, Vol. 152 (7), July 1995, p. 1073-1074, Sullivan, Patrick F.
5. Shisslak, C.M., Crago, M., & Estes, L.S. (1995). The Spectrum of Eating Disturbances. International Journal of Eating Disorders, 18 (3): 209-219.
6. National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders 10-year study, 2000
7. Public Health Service’s Office in Women’s Health, Eating Disorders Information Sheet, 2000.
8. Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), The Center for Mental Health Services (CMHS), offices of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.
9. Carlat, D.J., Camargo. Review of Bulimia Nervosa in Males. American Journal of Psychiatry, 154, 1997.
10. American Psychological Association, 2001.
11. International Journal of Eating Disorders 2002; 31: 300-308.
12. Prevention of Eating Problems with Elementary Children, Michael Levine, USA Today, July 1998.
13. Ibid.
14. The National Institute of Mental Health: “Eating Disorders: Facts About Eating Disorders and the Search for Solutions.” Pub No. 01-4901. Accessed Feb. 2002. http://www.nimh.nih.gov/publicat/nedspdisorder.cfm.
15. Anorexia Nervosa and Related Eating Disorders, Inc. website. Accessed Feb. 2002. http://www.anred.com/
16. Nutrition Journal. March 31, 2006.
17. Neumark-Sztainer, D. (2005). I’m, Like, SO Fat!. New York: The Guilford Press. pp. 5.
18. The Renfrew Center Foundation for Eating Disorders, “Eating Disorders 101 Guide: A Summary of Issues, Statistics and Resources,” published September 2002, revised October 2003, http://www.renfrew.org
19. Zucker NL, Womble LG, Williamson DA, et al. Protective factors for eating disorders in female college athletes. Eat Disorders 1999; 7: 207-218.
20. Sungot-Borgen, J. Torstveit, M.K. (2004) Prevalence of ED in Elite Athletes is Higher than in the General Population. Clinical Journal of Sport Medicine, 14(1), 25-32.
21. Bachner-Melman, R., Zohar, A, Ebstein, R, et.al. 2006. How Anorexic-like are the Symptom and Personality Profiles of Aesthetic Athletes? Medicine & Science in Sports & Exercise 38 No 4. 628-636.
I now believe that my body is a beautiful piece of ART, which bares the story of my existence up until now: my age, my gender, my ethnicity, my socio-economic background, my level of “formal” education, my breadth and depth of life experiences, and slightly more subjectively, my personal opinion about my own self-worth. I have a story to tell, because
I am a human being.
Those whom I have the opportunity to directly cross paths with during my lifetime will also have a story to tell of their own lives, their own experiences, their own set of personal circumstances, and it is a story that I will not be able to understand simply by looking at their outward appearance. Rather, I look forward to hearing the stories of those who I have the great honor of listening to as they recount their tales of joys, hopes, and sorrows. There will be those who do not show the mental and emotional scars on their skin, but inwardly, they are much like an amputee, missing a very important limb that still feels as if it should be there.
Thus, I encourage you to take notice of these statistics, and to know that WE can DO something about it. While there are many problems in this world that we cannot solve, what we CAN do is listen, love, and appreciate that each person is in fact so much more than what you see on the outside. Each persons’ body will greatly alter and transform over the course of his or her lifetime. Women might gain their tiger stripes from child birth, a reflection of another beautiful life being brought into this world. Both men and women might gain and lose their muscle mass due to cancer, stroke, or numerous other physical ailments. Soldiers might come home with all of their limbs in tact, but with the memories of the moments of their dear friends and fellow soldiers who lost theirs. We ALL have a story to tell, and it cannot be airbrushed or made to be prettier than what it actually is. Our stories and our moments of being are BEAUTIFUL, because they are real, powerful, and expressions of our existence.
Nora Ann Shannon, M.A., MFT-Intern, RYT-200, RMT
855 S. Center St.,
Suite 101
Reno, NV 89501
For an appointment, please call: 1.775.384.3111
Wow, what an amazing story!